When you want to do something really brave and really scary, there is a period of total discomfort. It’s a feeling that we all know well.
That stage of discomfort is a very challenging place to be.
But if it were easy we wouldn’t move through it so quickly.
In today’s Brave Yes episode, using the 3 Brave Yes Voices interviews I’ve published so far, I am taking a little time to talk about this messy middle process that happens when we say yes to a Brave Yes, what we need to do to move through it and what we find on the other side.
Part of The Brave Yes Journey, I have learned, is to unwrite some of the stories that are etched into our minds and bodies from childhood.
As little girls, we grow up doing what our family tells us to do. As modern mothers, we see the flaw in this pattern and many women are trying to change this narrative.
Going to church, following a set of religious beliefs and doing what is expected of you is just one of the many ingrained narratives that women live into.
But my guest today, Mara Irvin Clements, broke that story for herself and she’s sharing her Brave Yes Journey of having the courage to leave her church.
Maybe you are feeling something similar these days.
During this brave conversation, we talk about what it feels like to be abandoned, what resources Mara needed to use to leave that oppressive church and the inner resources she has developed as a result of that Brave Yes — and much, much more.
Mara is a community leader, partner, mother, and entrepreneur who is passionate about uncovering people’s value and worth (including her own). She practices this in her business, MoreSPACE, her business community, Women Connect, and in her family (the biggest challenge).
Do you ever have to drag yourself out of bed? Do you wonder what the most energizing morning routine would be to start your day? Are you tired of waking up and grabbing your phone when you could be doing other things? Have you been frustrated that you don’t get up early enough to take time for yourself — or to work on a creative project or dream?
If you are nodding your head to any of those, it sounds like you need some super morning motivation to get out of bed and feel great about your day.
There are a lot of reasons why getting out of bed is hard for you. I could list any number of issues I’ve heard over the years from my clients who are trying to design more meaningful lives with impact and purpose. They tell me they get to bed too late or don’t get enough sleep. They share that they love how cozy their bed is on cold mornings.
But sometimes not wanting to get out of bed is a stress or trauma response to the stress or burnout you may be feeling in your life due to being unhappy at work or in a relationship or in your career.
I work with women on finding what I call Soul Alignment … which means we get to the root of what’s zapping your energy and motivation and help you realign so you can live a more fulfilling life of meaning, purpose and impact.
Mornings are often one of the best places to infuse the tools you need to bounce forward from all that stress. Even in the middle of a really hard moment we can use our morning habits to feel stronger and more in control of our lives.
I’ve have had a consistent and powerful morning routine for more than 10 years. This past year I tweaked it to be even more impactful for myself and I am a better mother and wife when I take that time for myself.
Lately, with the addition of a new puppy, I was reminded how hard it can be when life feels crazy to make yourself get up and do what needs to be done.
But I quickly learned, again, that getting up early and sticking to my morning routine is absolutely my top priority each day.
While I begin my day with meditation, yoga, coffee and writing, I also work in nearly all of these other habits as well. These are what help me show up for my early morning client calls with a smile and ready to support them.
10 Energizing Habits to Boost Your Morning Motivation
Imagine waking up each day to go to work and rather than dressing to feel confident and beautiful, you dressed to hide your beauty and your radiance.
Now, imagine changing that story so that you can finally own who you are and shine more brightly in the world.
That’s exactly what today’s show is all about, which is such a thrill for me since my SoulShine Coaching for rising women leaders and business owners who are burned out is really meant to help you start to light up not or fade out.
My guest today is Victoria Kageni-Woodard, a fashion designer and multi-passionate entrepreneur, who immigrated to the United States and ended up working in the white male dominated construction industry where she spent her days downplaying her beauty and radiance.
Her Brave Yes was leaving that industry to start her own business.
But really it was returning home to herself.
Victoria grew up in Kenya and is a wife, mother of 4 and fashion designer. When she moved to the US she began working in the construction business where she was able to cultivate a spirit of unity and maintain her integrity in a white male dominated industry. She is now the creative force behind Gusa by Victoria, a women’s clothing line that infuses her African heritage into working women clothing. She is also the mother of a child on the autism spectrum which has propelled her in all that she does in her life. Follow her on Instagram or Facebook.
And I am pretty sure that journey begins — and sometimes ends — with the way we see ourselves through the eyes of our mothers.
It’s not easy to be yourself when it seems like everyone — even your mother — wants you to be someone else.
And, it’s not easy to communicate your needs. So … When we make the Brave Yes™ decision to do just that, we are stepping more fully into being our authentic selves — and living our truth — AND we are creating an energy of courage.
But that doesn’t mean that it’s not scary, or that it is easy to do — or that it’s done lightly without thought or effort. Not at all.
Today, my Brave Yes Show guest did just that — with her mother.
This episode is the first in a series called Brave Yes Voices. Over the next 10 weeks or so, I’ll be sharing different Brave Yes stories with you to highlight just SOME of the ways you can make a Brave Yes Leap yourself in order to be more fully you and to live in pure soul alignment.
My first guest is sharing her Brave Yes story about how she has learned to walk the brave middle path with her mother … both accepting herself (and not running away) and as a result being able to experience her mother differently so they can stay in relationship.
Karen C.L. Anderson is a master-certified life coach and author who has helped hundreds of smart, creative women use the difficult relationships they have with their mothers as a catalyst for growth.
Karen recognizes that what is possible personally is what is possible collectively, and that “the Mother Wound” is not actually about mothers, but about systems that oppress all women. She understands the adage, “hurt people, hurt people,” while also acknowledging that cultivating compassion and empathy does not have to equal access and that healthy boundaries (up to and including going “no contact”) are at the heart of healing.
My favorite conversation in this episode is when Karen talks about what inner and outer resources she needed in order to make the Brave Yes leap to not only accept herself but also her imperfect mother. Her decision to accept herself as she is AND her mother as she sees her — even if her mother is disappointed in her.